Albert Einstein said insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.
You fall into habits of doing the same thing over and over and getting frustrated when the outcome doesn’t miraculously improve. Maybe you don’t listen well. Or you don’t trust your senior management team to delegate. Or you give instructions but fail to include what you expect the outcomes to look like.
CEOs and business owners grow as leaders when they set their egos aside and recognize that a habit is interfering with their team’s success.
As a Vistage chair leading high-performing executives, my members are willing to be vulnerable and admit they need to change certain areas of their lives. They follow a unique technique I learned in my executive coach training on how to create new habits. It’s perfect for the new year.
Identify what needs to be changed
First, be specific about what you’re trying to do. What habit is interfering with the effectiveness of your team’s success? List details including who, what, where, when and why the habit appears.
In great detail, define what behavior you want to change or create and what you will commit to doing. One example of a habit all successful leaders need to master is having strong listening skills.
Maybe you feel that when your employees are talking, you already know the “answer” and are not really listening. Or you need to ask more probing questions to understand the deeper issue. Or you talk a lot and don’t give others a chance to be heard.
By not improving your listening skills, your staff will be less likely to develop their own abilities to grow within the company. Imagine how new listening habits could improve your relationships at home as well.
Ask others for help
The following habit-changing technique requires accountability, tracks progress and lets you receive ongoing advice. It requires you to involve others to help you learn new habits.
Next, commit to wanting the new behavior and to accept feedback from people who want to make you an even better leader.
Select five people from your professional life who will give you honest feedback. Each month, ask them two questions about the habit you want to change, and a follow-up question that asks for their honest, detailed feedback: Tell them to rate you on a scale of 1 (rarely seen) to 5 (seen all the time).
Explain what your behavior would look like. Receiving a “5” score means XYZ; receiving a “3” score means ABC.
- How am I doing with improving my habit?
- What’s one thing overall that I could do better as a leader?
- What other advice would you have for me?
How you respond will determine if your leadership team believes that you respect their feedback.
Your goal with question #1 is to achieve three consecutive months with the average score of 4.5 or higher.
The second question continues the discussion because you trust their perspective in becoming the best leader for all your employees beyond the new habit you are forming.
The third question is strategically placed. As an executive coach, I’ve learned the power behind asking “and what else?”
Next, put some logistics in place. Schedule one-on-one meetings with your senior team. And, before reviewing the five people’s scores, give yourself a score for the first question.
Ask these people to let you know when you’re lapsing into the bad habit. If, for example, you need to improve your listening skills, and someone thinks you’re talking more than listening, that person can send you a subtle signal by tugging on their ear or rubbing their nose.
Don’t be discouraged by setbacks. Achieving three consecutive months with a score of 4.5 or higher will require great effort. If you admit you don’t know everything, your executive team will follow your lead to strengthen their own leadership skills. Everyone will be stronger as a result.
