Leadership is tough. Stress is a common occurrence. We’ve heard many a leader say, “My job would be so easy if it weren’t for all of these employees.”
We observe leaders struggling with multiple issues. Below are some of the more common challenges, along with a few simple ideas to manage them.
Navigating friendships with former peers. Making the leap from co-worker to leader is tough. It can be awkward. On Friday, you were one of the team, and on Monday, you’re the leader of the team. So, what can you do? 1. Share gratitude. This can be as simple as “I’m grateful for the opportunity to work with all of you in this role.” 2. Ask. Meet with each person individually and ask, “What will be helpful for me to know as I make this shift toward being your leader?” “What do you want or need me to do in this role?” 3. You’re a member of the team. At the same time, be careful about trying to be “one of the guys.”
Mindset. This is a tough one. Most leaders are high-performing individual contributors. It is often very difficult to abandon this definition of self. Leaders will look around at their employees and compare. “This person doesn’t do things the way I did;” “That person doesn’t do things as quickly as I did.” It’s easy to become frustrated. Remember, as a leader, you are measured on a different outcome. The shift is from your own productivity to your effectiveness in maximizing the productivity of others. It is necessary to shift away from a me-centered mindset.
Helping employees sort through conflict. Conflict is an inevitable part of a work environment. For a whole host of reasons, employees struggle with their working relationships. Most leaders lack the skills to help, so we see them default to clichés. One of the most common ones we hear is, “You need to play nice on the playground.” This is code for, “I don’t know how to help you.” Working environments do not have to be perfect, and not everyone needs to like everyone. If the work is impacted, however, you will need to get involved. You can bring your two employees together and share something like, “I understand things are difficult, and because the work of the team is being impacted, we need to address the issue.” You can have an objective conversation, asking each person to share a couple of things about the other person: 1. What is this person doing that I appreciate or find helpful? 2. What is this person doing that is difficult for me? 3. What one or two things would I like this person to do differently? By giving each an opportunity to objectively share, the next step involves their response. What tweaks will each make to help improve a less-than-ideal situation?
The need for empathy. Every day, someone will have something: A car breaks down, a child becomes sick, someone has used up all of his or her PTO by July, someone is experiencing a divorce, or your people are not getting along. You cannot turn a blind eye to these things. It is important to weave in an element of understanding of the challenge of the human existence. While doing your job to hold people accountable, you can also communicate with a simple, “I’m sorry that has happened” or “That must be frustrating.”
The work! “I had no idea how much work was involved.” This is a common refrain. Leadership is tough. It’s not just the lines at your door; it’s all of the things you need to be doing to ensure your employees have clear roles, responsibilities, goals and assignments. Your work involves paying attention, acknowledging work, providing feedback and having tough conversations – not to mention the unpredictable nature of the role. As an individual contributor, you are in total control of yourself, including your habits, your effectiveness, your reliability and your mood. Leadership of people is unpredictable: they quit, they don’t do what they say they’re going to do, they’re grumpy and they can bring drama. The solution starts with your own awareness that leadership is hard work. Invest time to strengthen your capabilities.
With so many situations to grapple with, you likely will not have all of the answers. Develop a habit of asking for help.
